Being Natural

I think being natural is the hardest thing to do if I were to be in front of the guy I like...
I don't know why but it is so to me...
Instead of acting natural... I become more cautious about his presence beside me...
Haiz... Which is why I'll turn cold or I'll just ignore him but when he's gone... My eyes can't stop searching for him again... Haiz...
My heart can't stop thumping and pumping hard... It's beating like crazy... @.@
It's like I can faint anytime... Lolz...
Haiz... Everytime I see him... He looks so... So... Hmm... Prince-like...
It's like whatever he's doing at that time of point... He looks so cool...

Haiz... Worried... Since... He is handsome... He is cool... And I'm sure I'm not hallucinating... And people do agree to the fact that he is handsome...
Which is why I am extremely worry...
Well... He is popular afterall...
Lolz... It is because we are not in a relationship... That's why I'm worried...?
Lolz... Status is important afterall... I can be a passionate lover once I get the permission but... I still didn't get a thumb up from him yet...
Haiz... Am I one step closer or one step backward?
Haiz... Hopefully... It's a step closer... Maybe not to 100% or even 90% but how bout 75%?
Haha... Am I asking too much? :P

Hmm... What more can I do for him?
Hmm... Cook? Bake? Knit? Caring?
Lolz... Learning... Learning... Those of the following above are my first time doing that even for the "caring actions"... I couldn't and wouldn't... Not even to my best friend, Vinu... (Lolz... Sorry dear... XD)
But I'm trying my best to care and learn from the people surrounding me... :)

Haiz... However...
It is also no good in a relationship when a girl likes a guy more than the guy likes the girl...
It's dangerous and fragile...
Hmm... What could I do to fix that problem?
Hmm... I'm trying my best not to be selfish and self-centered...
Not to be overly exaggerating... Not to be over jealous on some petty matter...
And try not to bug him every minute that's possible... Some... Er... I should say... Most guy hate that...

Well... Anyway... I don't think I can give up now...
Hmm... My friends said that I shouldn't give up that easily since I did manage to get to this point... Even though I'm having some trouble in my life but... I shouldn't mix that problem with matter... Lolz...

Well... Anyway... Wish me luck on Sunday...
It's my only chance...
To have fun with him... To have some quality time with him...
To increase that percentage...
To feel free from my problems...
To ignore everything in the world and just concentrate on him...
Haiz... Hope I can have the best time of my life yet...
Wait for my good news? XD